A THANXGIVING MASSAGE
"Before you eat 'em, you gotta kill 'em."
-Genghis Khan, probably apocryphal
We note (just below the picture of 'black friday' campouts) that the Bundesbank had what might be called... uh... uneven results on it's sovereign debt auction yesterday. One assumes the US long bond yield will continue it's inexorable march to 200BPS and gold (although we are unsure what it actually tastes like - but those with serious long positions may be contemplating the notion...) will hold up as the sole appetizing financial instrument in the Known Universe.
In other news, noted financial commentator Mark Lee and his daughter will journeying perilously close to the Louisiana border to visit his sister and assorted lovingly dysfunctional relatives for the noon meal. Some estimates as to the number of fatalities occurring below the Mason-Dixon Line due to incidents involving deep frying whole turkeys run into to dozens.
A search for light news on this most American of Holidays (still the greatest country on earth - if you leave off certain minor European tax havens and most of Scandinavia) reveals that legendary New York literary house Alfred A. Knopf continues to redesign it's iconic Borzoi imprint with seemingly every book it brings out these days. This trend (known as 'dynamic logo') seems to be gathering steam as various commercial enterprises appear to be willing to try anything at all to sell products to consumers who have no cash (old news) and rapidly shrinking access to credit (see also above re: German bonds). While these sorts of things are still of limited interest to the general reader, we predict that an increasing public fascination with useless observations (a trend which has been on the rise since the dawn of Christendom) will remain real, yet stubbornly inscrutable.
For those fortunate few of you who missed Susan Stamberg's unbearable NPR Thanksgiving piece yesterday - rest assured, the recipe for that bizarre onion infested cranberry sauce that she recounts in elemental detail each year does not seem to have changed. We speculate that the concoction (which appears to have only marginal use as a comestible) may prove of some value as a poultice to sooth fried turkey injuries. Those of you with connections to BigPharma take note.
As we remind every year at this moment: the best cure for TG Day indigestion is prophylactic in nature. Those of you who are able should stick primarily to fluids (viz: ethanol and its constituents) and treat the solid food offerings as appetizers. In the event you fall short, remember that the omeprazole molecule is available as a generic in Northern Mexico for six cents or so per dose. Alternatively, you can tap your 'health plan' (a funky euphemism if ever there was one) for a $400 bottle of Nexium. Again - those of you with connections to BigPharma, take note...
In closing, let me remark that there comes a time in every failed creative persons bio-rhythmic cycle that the sorts of things above simply must be written down. I thank you for sitting through this (did any of you?) and hope that you and Mrs. Lincoln richly enjoy the play.
God bless America. And if You would, Sir - throw in a little of that ol' white magic for the Euro.
Eat up - before your higher self rebels.
Mark Lee
-still nursing old culinary woundings from a confusing childhood