Is it Time to Neuter Zuck and Throw him in a Pit Somewhere?
What the Would YOU do with
Thirty Billion Dollars in Your Checking Account?
MarkyMark & Prissy Zuckerberg plot the torture and dismemberment of California governor Gavin Newsom while appearing to listen to him on a Zoom call. |
To be honest I never liked this little pricksicle.
Hating on Zuck - a nickname which misses the word "suck" by a single letter - has entertained millions for over a decade. If you think it's because we're envious of his dough, well look at the big brain on you. The difference between me and The Other White Mark is that I am jealous of his money - but he is not jealous of my possession of a soul.
I'd also like to take a moment to make clear that I'm not jealous of everything the boy has.
Like his hair.
Or Wuhan Bridezilla up there. Wowzers. A quarter trill sitting in the office safe... and you end with this chick?
Must have a hell of a personality.
Before you start in on me... I don't believe in leaving innocent spouses out of things like this. And if you think calling a defenseless, innocent, thirty-five year old Asian multi-billionaire Wuhan Bridezilla is some fucked up, MAGA, racist bullshit - - you'd be right. But I cut and pasted it from Zuck's website - www.facebook.com - not mine. So I'm just quoting when I say Wuhan Bridezilla- and nobody can culture cancel you for that. Can they?
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Sociology teaching moment: Innocent spouses are rare. More rare than Facebook posts by Nazis about killing Jews in any event. Less rare than US election news and analysis from the Internet Research Agency in your FB "news" feeds. Zuckerberg to world: "I got your feed right here..."
QUICK: WHICH WEBSITE IS THE BIGGEST SUPERSPREADER OF MISINFORMATION ABOUT THE CORONAVIRUS PANDEMIC?
(It's not a trick question)
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I'm not going to apologize for what follows, because it comes from a genuine place. I'm speaking from the heart when I offer "feedback" to the worker bees at Facebook. It may be a black heart, but it's my heart. Look, in all fairness to me the little bastards asked for my "feedback". Should you ever decide to offer "feedback" to Squad Zuck, please exercise extreme caution. Feeding(back) the spawn of a chimpanzee and a wraith is extremely risky. It can bite your fucking arm off at the elbow and use what's left as a bloody straw to suck your soul (viz. your 'personal information') out of you. Hey, speaking of soul sucking billionaires...
How many hours did you spend on social media last month? Have you ever considered that you could've spent all that time lying in a warm bath staring at the open straight razor sitting in the soap dish thinking about other cool stuff you might do instead? I'm only saying that life offers a cornucopia of possibilities other than spending fourteen hours a week as an unpaid research subject. Your breathtaking generosity with your time and your humanity has put enough money in the pockets of that guy up there who looks like he's seconds away from going full Ted Bundy... that he can afford to move to Mars. Which is probably a much more suitable place for him. He could frolic around up there in the low gravity and CO2 breeze with South African CRISPR experiment Elon Musk.
It's hardly a coincidence that a lot of billionaires are headed for outer space - and you should be rooting for them. These guys aren't planning on letting people like you come with to Mars and that's actually the good news. These delusional little demi-gods may believe they're running from the disaster of planet earth but what they're really doing is running to a different place where they can create yet another disaster.
We'll all be doing much better down here without the Insane Clown Billionaire Posse sharing our ecosphere. I predict we'll be amazed at how successfully we can all get back to the business of being actual human beings again. Instead of lab rats. The time when people like Jeff Bezos and Bill Gates are safely consigned to vacuum of space can't come soon enough. How about we lock the door and turn off the radios when they split?